Coercive control is when someone close to you tries to control or be in charge of the things you do, making you feel scared for your safety and wellbeing. They might do this by hurting you or threatening to hurt you and make you shame in front of family and friends. Coercive control is almost always found in cases of family and domestic violence. This person trying to control and hurt you can be anyone in your kinship system. It can be aunts, uncles, cousins, grandchildren, or grandparents.
This pdf fact sheet helps you work out if coercive control is happening, and how to spot the signs.
If you’re worried that someone you know might be experiencing coercive control, or something doesn’t seem quite right, you can help by choosing a safe place to have a yarn. It is important that you choose a space away from others, so they feel safe and free to yarn without anyone else listening in. Tell them you’re worried about them, listen without judgement, and take what they say seriously. Rather than telling them what to do, let them know there are organisations that can help keep them safe. It is important to remember that you cannot force someone to seek help. The best thing you can do is support them and be there when they feel ready to seek help
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